"No, don"t you dare come near him!" sobbed Lydia. "Poor, dear Pa, always so generous and so good to us! I should think you"d be afraid, Martie--I should think you"d actually be afraid to talk so wickedly!"
She essayed an embrace of her father, but Malcolm shook her loose, and crossed the hall; they heard the study door slam. For a few minutes the sisters stared at each other, then Martie went to the side door, and called Teddy in as quiet a voice as she could command, and Lydia vanished kitchenward, with only one scared and reproachful look.
But the evening was not over. After Teddy was in bed, Martie, staring at herself in the mirror, suddenly came to a new decision. She ran down to the study, and entered informally.
"Pa!" She was on his knee, her arms about him. "I"m sorry I am such a problem--so little a comfort!--to you. Forgive me, Pa, for I always truly loved you--"
"If you truly want my forgiveness," he said stiffly, trying to dislodge the clinging young arms, "you know how to deserve it--"
The old phraseology, and the old odour of teeth and skin! Martie alone was changed.
"But forgive me, Pa, and I"ll truly try never to cross you again."
Reluctantly, he conceded a response to her kiss, and she sat on the arm of his chair, and played with the thin locks of his hair while she completed the peace. Then she went into the kitchen, where Lydia was sitting at the table, soaking circles of paper in brandy for the preservation of the gla.s.ses of jelly ranged before her.
"Lyd, I just went and told Pa that I was sorry that I am such a beast, and we"ve made it up--"
"I don"t think you ought to talk as if it was just a quarrel," Lydia said. "If Pa was angry with you, he had good cause--"
"Darling, I know he did! But I couldn"t bear to go to sleep with ill feeling between us, and so I came down, and apologized, and did the whole thing handsomely--"
"You couldn"t talk so lightly if you really CARED, Mart!"
"I care tremendously, Lyd. Why don"t you use paraffin?"
"I know," Lydia said with interest, "Angela does. But somehow Ma always did it this way."
"Well, I"ll mark "em for you!" Martie began to cut neat little labels from white paper, and to write on them, "Currant Jelly with Rasp.
1915." Presently she and Lydia were chatting pleasantly.
"I really put up too much one year," Lydia said, "and it began to spoil, so I sent a whole box of it out to the Poor House; I don"t suppose they mind! But Mrs. Dolan there never sent my gla.s.ses back!
However, this year I"ll give you some, Mart; unless Polly put some up."
"Unless I go to New York!" Martie suggested.
Lydia"s whole face darkened.
"And if I do, you and Sally will be good to Teddy?" his mother asked, her tone suddenly faltering.
"Martie, what POSSESSES you to talk about going to New York now?"
"Oh, Lyddy, you"d never understand! It"s just the longing to do something for myself, to hold my own there, to--well, to make good!
Marrying here, and being comfortably supported here, seems like--like failure, almost, to me! If it wasn"t for Teddy, I believe that I would have gone long ago!"
"And a selfish feeling like that is strong enough to make you willing to break a good man"s heart, and desert your child?" asked Lydia in calm tones.
"It won"t break his heart, Lyd--not nearly so much as he broke yours, years ago! And when I can--when I could, I would send for my boy! He"d be happier here--" Martie, rather timidly watching her sister"s face, suddenly realized the futility of this and changed her tone. "But let"s not talk about it any more to-night, Lydia, we"re both too tired and excited!"
"I don"t understand you," Lydia said patiently and wearily, "I never did. I should think that SOMETIMES you"d wonder whether you"re right, and everybody else in the world is wrong--or whether the rest of us know SOMETHING--"
Martie generously let her have the prized last word, and went upstairs again.
To her surprise she found Teddy awake. She sat down on the edge of the bed, and leaned over the small figure.
"Teddy, my own boy! Haven"t you been asleep?"
"Moth"," he said, with a child"s uncanny prescience of impending events, "if I were awfully, awfully bad--"
"Yes, Ted?" she encouraged him, as he paused.
"Would you ever leave me?" he asked anxiously.
The question stabbed her to the heart. She could not speak.
"I"m enough for you, aren"t I?" he said eagerly. Still she did not speak. "Or do you need somebody else?" he asked urgently.
A pang went through her heart. She tightened her arm about him.
"Teddy! You are all I have, dear!"
His small warm hand played with the ruffle of her blouse.
"But--how about Uncle Cliff, and Uncle John, and all?" he asked. Martie was silent. "Are you going to marry them?" he added, with a child"s hesitation to say what might be ridiculous.
"No, Ted," she answered honestly.
"Well, promise me," he said urgently, sitting up to tighten his arms about her throat, "promise me that you will never leave me! I will never leave you, if you will promise me that! PROMISE!"
He was crying now, and Martie"s own tears started thick and fast.
"I might have to leave you--just for a while--" she began.
"Not if you promised!" he said jealously.
"Even if I went away from Aunt Sally and the children, Ted, and we had to live in a little flat again?" she stammered.
"Even THEN!" he said, with a shaken attempt at a manly voice. "I remember the pears in the carts, and the box you dropped the train tickets into," he said encouragingly, "and I remember Margar"s bottles that you used to let me wash! You"d take me into the parks, and down to the beach, wouldn"t you, Moth"?"
"Oh, Teddy, my little son! I"d try to make a life for you, dear!"
"And WE"D be our family, just you and me!" he said uncertainly.
"We"d be a family, all by ourselves," she promised him, laughing and crying. And she clung to him hungrily, kissing the smooth little forehead under the rich tumble of hair, her tears falling on his face.
Ah, this was hers, this belonged to her alone, out of all the world.
"I"m glad you told me how you felt about this, Teddy," she said. "It makes it all clearer to me. You and I, dear--that"s the only real life for us. I owe you that. I promise you, we"ll never be separated while Mother can help it."
His wet little face was pressed against hers.
"And you"ll NEVER talk about it any more!" he said violently. "Because I cry about it sometimes, at night--"